Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh am I ever a rule girl.
This morning during our special BLT-on-Wednesday show, Lynne told a story about a drive-thru she visits that has a do-not-enter sign on one side of the parking lot. At times, she may {ahem} still choose to go that way, despite the fading sign. My OCD about busted through the studio windows when I heard that.
We have a do-not-enter section of a street close to our house, and every time I see a car driving the wrong way, I holler a quick driver's ed lesson to its driver {through the safety of my rolled up, tinted windows, of course} and mutter to Ryan that no one follows the rules anymore.
I do love me some rules.
But there's a difference between rules and formulas.
RULES are set in stone and were made to be followed. FORMULAS are expectations - and our lives don't all follow the same formulas.
This morning I read that Jill {Duggar} Dillard and her husband of eight weeks, Derick, announced they're expecting their first baby. I skimmed through the comments. Not all of them, as they numbered in the thousands. It was a divided camp. Many commenters said they weren't surprised...they were excited...and they wished them the best. Then there were those who said it was too soon. They hadn't
Jill and Derick didn't break any rules. But they have broken some formulas - and it seems people are very attached to the expectations of formulas and don't know what to do when they're not followed like rules.
Ryan and I had only told our friends, family, and church that we were dating about a week before he proposed. I understood that most people were under the impression that we did only date FOR a week before getting engaged, and that wasn't true. But it began the ruffling of the feathers that continued when we announced that we'd get married two months later. In Florida. Outside. And immediately after we got married, the baby questions began. Formulas swirled around us, and as we bucked one after the other, people didn't know what to do - other than tell us what we should do.
And it's not just about relationships.
Last night I had the privilege of hearing Colleen Coble speak about the writing process. She talked about how she researches for her novels, how she writes, edits, names her characters, comes up with ideas, and more. She spoke for about an hour and a half, and I drank in everything she said, learning from a successful writer.
But even as I listened, I noticed she writes in a wildly different pattern than I learned in college. She writes differently from some other writers I've studied. The things they preach as must-do steps...she skips entirely. The things that bring her so much joy {and success!} as an author would unglue some of the other writers I've studied.
And as I thought through these opposing patterns, I was reminded again that life is not a formula.
There is, of course, right and wrong. There are rules in certain settings. There is always God's unshakable truth.
But there are many...many...parts of life that are just formulas. Yours will look different from mine. And it doesn't mean you're right and I'm wrong. We're just different. And different is okay. Oh that we would celebrate it instead of criticize it!
It's okay that you don't understand my methods on everything and it's also fine that I don't understand yours.
God made us both...unique and precious in His sight.
I'm Bekah. I was born to a completed family and grew up as an only child, with sisters out of the house and married. I was single for 14 years of my adult life. When I found love, I found it quickly and transitioned into married life. We're cat parents and we love it. I love to scrapbook and document our lives on the blog and journal and bake desserts. I hate working out and eating vegetables, but I do both anyway. This is who I am.
You might be different. Not might be. You ARE different. And I celebrate you for being who you are and making the decisions you've made.
Let's give some rules-vs-formula-grace, my friends!
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