Wait! There's More to Tell!

You'd think that 60 minutes would be more than enough time to thoroughly discuss a topic on Mid-Morning. Most days it is. But not Tuesday and Wednesday. And what didn't make it on the air is too good to leave on the table. 

Tuesday, Lorraine Pintus and Dr. Julie Slattery went beyond challenging and encouraging wives to pursue passion in their marriages, they gave women biblical permission to initiate and thoroughly enjoy physical intimacy with their husbands. The original Hebrew translation of Song of Solomon 5:1 gives us God's blessing over a husband and wife:

Be intoxicated with your sexual love! Your sexual union is right, pure, and beautiful!

 

This is just the kind of bountiful blessing the enemy of your soul wants to steal from you. So he hisses lies.

 

Your body isn't desirable.

 

Sex is dirty.

 

Sex is power. It's okay to use it to get what you want from your husband.

 

How do you smother a lie? With the truth found in God's Word. Linda and Dr. Juli offer three practical steps modeled by Jesus -- our example in all things -- in Matthew 4:1-10, that you can use to confront the enemy's lies in your marriage (and everywhere else):

 

Step #1: SPEAK the lie.

 

Step #2: HOLD UP THE SHIELD OF FAITH in your left hand -- "I trust the Lord Jesus Christ. He is Truth!"

 

Step #3: PROCLAIM THE TRUTH with The Sword of the Spirit in your right hand (the Word of God).

 

Tamara, who was sexually abused as a child, and deeply desired a healed and renewed heart before getting married, utilized a full-frontal assault against Satan's lies with these words:
 

Step #1: SPEAK the lie -- "I'm believing that because of my past, I can't enjoy sex. I can't be pure."

 

Step #2: HOLD UP THE SHIELD OF FAITH in your left hand -- "I want to believe in Jesus and His truth about my sexuality."

 

Step #3: PROCLAIM THE TRUTH with The Sword of the Spirit in your right hand (the Word of God) -- Therefore, if any woman is in Christ, she is a new creature; the old things passed away, behold, new things have come (2 Corinthians 5:17 NASB). "God, I want only Your thoughts, Your beliefs to be a part of me. Show me how to live this out with my new husband."

What lie is the enemy telling you?  More importantly, what does God say? Use an online concordance to learn the truth. Now that you know the truth, memorize it. You are armed and ready for a fight because the Sword of Truth is always with you, ready to rip through any lie the enemy spews. Doing this has infused the power of God into my life, which has helped strengthen and grow my faith. It will do the same for you.


Wednesday's extra gem will energize you, but in a different way! Dr. Michael Breus, aka The Sleep Doctor, knows how to take the perfect power nap...and now you can too.

Cool down six ounces of drip coffee with an ice cube, drink, and then lie down for a 25-minute nap. You will get into the early stages of sleep, but the caffeine will kick in at about the 25-minute mark to wake you up feeling refreshed. You'll be good for hours. But don't doze any longer than the allotted time or you'll fall into deeper sleep stages and wake up groggy.

I wonder if this works with tea?

I really enjoy hearing from Mid-Morning listeners. What show or shows have especially helped you? What topic would you like us to discuss? Send me an e-mail at lnford@wbcl.org.

I welcome your input and value your friendship.

Blessings...

Lynne




 

 



 

 



 

 



 



 

 

 



 



 



 



 



 



The Brain's "Rooms"

If you've listened to any of Dr. Earl Henslin's Mid-Morning interviews, you've heard him rattle off the names of areas in the brain with ease: amygdala, basal ganglia, and cingulate gyrus -- to name just three.

This diagram, taken from his book This Is Your Brain on Joy, published by Thomas Nelson, shows the location of each area of the brain and notes what it regulates.



Used by permission

Gulping Conviction

I sat down to write my blog post for this week and admittedly had a bad attitude.

You know those days where you feel like everyone is singling you out on purpose just to punish you in some way? And you know in your heart of hearts that nothing is purposeful or malicious...just people in a hurry, not thinking...

..but it still hurts and you struggle between keeping to yourself, hoping to not spread the infection of the bad attitude...and running around spreading it to anyone you can find, because you wonder if that "misery loves company" thing is really true.

Yes, that was my day.

And then I saw that Angie Smith had posted a new picture to Instagram. It might surprise you to know that I know virtually nothing about Instagram, though I am known in these parts as the Bekahrazzi - and that name did not come to me by accident. I have no Instagram account and I am not obsessed {yet} with following anyone on there. But now and then, Angie will tweet a picture from Instagram and of course then, I'm compelled to look.

The picture was captioned "Look closely, and you'll see 2 little girls sent outside to pray for each other because they can't seem to get along today. My view from here is a good reminder. We are so small."

I opened the picture, which was of 2 massive trees shading a sunny backyard...and wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy off in the bottom left corner of the picture were two tiny spots - one in a dark shirt and one in a red shirt. Presumably the 2 little girls sent outside to pray for each other.

And immediately I gulped the conviction poured over me.

A beautiful sunny day...the very picture of joy and beauty...and these two are sitting it out for a while to deal with their hearts.

That same sunny day wraps around me from outside the office...and I feel the need to go visit a far corner of its beauty myself. To walk away from the toxic air I've created with my attitude and sit in a far corner of beauty, so small in the greatness of the day...and pray. Deal with my heart.

To gulp grace like I've gulped conviction.

Transformed by an Empty Roll of TP

Confession: I used to be bothered when encountering an empty toilet paper roll. Enraged was more like it. Not a "Someone-might-find-themselves-stranded-on-the-throne-without-tp" frustration, but rather a "What-kind-of-yahoo-leaves-behind-an-empty-roll?!" agitation.

And you'll never guess where the bulk of these violations occurred: in the women's restroom at WBCL.

Shocking. I know.

For a several month period, it seemed every time I went into the lone stall in the woman's lavatory, an empty roll was there to torment me. In my mind, I ran through the list of my fellow female employees trying to deduce which of these lovely women could commit this crime against humanity.

What kind of adult woman who loves Jesus acts this way?

In this case, me. Until the Spirit of Jesus broke into my craziness with these words I'd memorized a couple of years ago: And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus...work hard and cheerfully at whatever you do as though you were working for the Lord rather than people (Colossians 3:17, 23).

Okay, Jesus. You've exposed my pride, yet again. Pride is behind every sin. It whispers, "Life is about you. ALWAYS about you...even in a restroom stall.

So you know what I did? First, I asked God to forgive me. Then, I asked Him to change my heart. His plan for transformation was ingenious: multiple opportunities to change empty toilet paper rolls. All of sudden, every bathroom I visited was flush with empty toilet paper rolls: gas stations, restaurants, church, my parents' home...I kid you not! The irony was not lost on me. As I'd replace a scratchy cardboard tube with a plush, full roll, I'd pray (and sincerely mean it) for the person who'd left it behind and offer my action as a gift of love to Jesus.

Anger over an empty tp roll may appear petty, and it is. So, why am I spilling my ugliness to you? Because I know that you have the same struggle, dear sister. Maybe not with an empty toilet paper roll, but with your own version of it. Sin, all sin, puts space between us and God and prevents the Spirit from working freely in us.

What's your "empty tp roll" issue? Confess it. Ask for forgiveness. And then ask God to transform you. He will. It's His great desire for you! Intimacy, peace, and a lightness of heart await!

P.S. I shared this story at a recent retreat with my Sisters in Spirit at Converse Church of Christ. These dear women sent me a little gift to remind me to say "Yes!" to Jesus in everything...including changing empty toilet paper rolls with a joyful spirit.

Thank you, friends, for these earrings that make toilet paper appear fashionable. I wear them with a grateful heart and a huge smile on my face.

Blessings...

Lynne

On Rejection...

Most of the time, I’ve got it together pretty well. God has done a mighty work in my heart and has healed so much of what felt lost, broken, and forgotten from days gone by. And I credit Him fully with that work…knowing it was all him and NOT at all me.

But we are all trekking this road together and I am not gonna lie to you. Some days, I do NOT have it all together, and I’m like a high school wreck all over again.

I tell you this with a modest amount of embarrassment, but I tell you anyway, because I have a feeling I’m not alone in that.

This week, I had one such day.

Ryan and I were having a casual conversation at dinner, when we brought up the name of a mutual friend of ours. My nose wrinkled up as I realized I hadn’t read anything from her on Facebook for just a few days – and she tended to post several times a day. I wondered if something was wrong, so I opened my laptop to check her page and was greeted with this:

 What??

When did we stop being friends?

It washed over me in one hot and cold wave all at once. She defriended me.

I just stared at Ryan, a bit slapped on the cheek by this “add as friend” icon. My mouth felt cotton-y as I said “She defriended me!”

People, I am thirty-five years old. I have been out of high school since the spring of 1996 and this is FACEBOOK for crying out loud.

But some of you are nodding right now because you know. That hot confusion and embarrassment and overanalyzing of what did I do? What did I say? washed over me.

I thought I would pop back right away, because, as previously stated, I am thirty-five years old and this is Facebook.

But as minutes ticked by, the sick high-school-is-back-and-worse-than-ever feeling got worse. I did something I’ve not done since I got married. I took a cry-in-the-shower-until-the-water-gets-cold shower. Poor Ryan. He probably wondered what had become of his typically-together wife.

After my shower, I sat on the bed and tried to figure out how something like this got to be such a big deal to a girl who is supposed to be a grownup.

Ryan was ridiculously patient and understanding as he watched me muddle through my first post-marriage Facebook rejection. I tried a {rather bumbling, I’m sure} explanation of how it’s not WHO she is or WHERE she defriended me that mattered…as much as the overwhelming flood of memories of such things it brought back. And, of course, the confusion of what I’d done to bring on such an action.

That night, after serving myself with the worst wife ever award, I stared into the darkness of our bedroom, Ryan’s sleep-filled breathing even beside me, and prayed for God to instill in my heart that what matters is what He has given me…so many good, kind, caring friends who have opened their arms and hearts to love me.

The next morning, I sat on the couch, clutching the cup of coffee Ryan made for me, and he put his arm around me and asked if I felt better. My face turned a bit red again and I told him I was trying to grow up and not let high school rejection creep back in.

And God brought this to me – Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand…. (Psalm 139:16-18).

And THAT is where the worth lies. For me. And for you, sweet friend.

"10 Lifesaving Principles for Women in Difficult Marriages"

If you're in a difficult marriage -- or know someone who is -- Karla Downing's 10 Lifesaving Principles for Women in Difficult Marriages -- is a gift from heaven.

Here's a summary of the 10 principles found on Karla's website:

Overwhelmed in their difficult marriages, Christian women often react in ways that make their problems worse and even prevent change out of confusion, misinformation, denial, anger, and fear. They usually find themselves too afraid to apply tough love, even if they are convinced they should. They are often given simplistic advice like “love your husband,” which increases their guilt and isolation. I struggled for twenty years in my difficult marriage until I learned how to apply these lifesaving principles. As a Christian support group leader, speaker, writer, counselor, and mentor, I have shared them with other women and seen their lives and marriages change. My book provides tools that are scriptural and practical to enable women to handle the variety of complex emotions and situations they are faced with.

1. Understand Scriptural Truths. Examines common misconceptions about submission, rights, respect, gentleness, perseverance, forgiveness, keeping the peace, and divorce.
2. Reach Out. Encourages women to reach out for support in a variety of ways, including counseling, support groups, friends, family, and by becoming informed about the problems you are dealing with.
3. Change Yourself, Not Him. Provides ideas for taking the focus off changing their husbands and onto changing themselves.
4. Detach with Love. Explains how women stop enabling while treating their husbands with kindness and compassion and detaching from their anger, moods, threats, arguments, blame, and crises.
5. Nurture Yourself. Suggests ideas for how women can take care of their emotional, physical, spiritual, and mental needs.
6. Face Your Fears. Describes specific fears women in difficult marriages deal with and how to face those fears by trusting God.
7. Speak the Truth in Love. Helps women admit the truth to themselves and then their husbands through loving confrontation.
8. Set Boundaries. Defines boundaries and lists specific considerations for setting boundaries in the areas of money, sex, relationships, addictions, abuse, affairs, separation, and divorce.
9. Make Your Children a Priority. Gives guidelines for meeting their children’s needs and handling discipline disagreements with their husbands.
10. Enter God’s Rest. After doing all they can, women enter God’s rest by letting Him heal, redeem, and restore their lives in His way and time.

Humbly ask God's wisdom and direction for applying His biblical principles to your marriage. He WILL answer!

We Think You Might Enjoy Trying...

We had a great time chatting with many of you via phones, e-mail and Facebook on today's Mid-Morning. Lots of funny stories, and an especially poignant one from husband-to-be, Jonathan, who's getting married this Saturday.

Dave Sosson e-mailed a product he thinks everyone should know about it (one of our call-in topics): the Shoulder Strap Adjuster sold on the Harriet Carter website. If you've ever dealt with a seat belt that rubs against your neck or hits you wrong across the bust, this little gadget, says Dave, is the answer.

My new favorite indulgence (and it IS an indulgence, so it's a special-occasion-only treat for me) is Haagen-Dazs sea salt caramel gelato. It's worth the money and calories when you want something exceptional.

Thanks to everyone who Facebooked, e-mailed, or called. We can't think of a better way to begin another week than with our Mid-Morning friends!

Blessings...

Lynne

A Time for Everything on Mid-Morning

Though he was the wisest man who ever lived , King Solomon fell off the tracks when it came to women: 700 wives of royal birth and 300 concubines. Really? What was the man thinking? Still, he got it right in Ecclesiastes 3 with his poetic teaching about life's seasons and cycles.

To everything there is a season....

Solomon's words capture how I feel about Mid-Morning's topics. I believe they need to reflect the realities of people's lives. Your life. My life.

So we laugh, a lot, on BLT.

And we grieve together on shows discussing losses of every kind: marriages ending in divorce; once-close families torn apart by hard hearts and misunderstandings; sickness and suffering that lead to physical death; disappointments and dissipated dreams that force us to choose giving up -- or holding fast to the hand of Jesus and beginning again.

And we celebrate. Boy, howdy, do we celebrate: God's continual presence in every moment of our lives; delicious food; beauty and goodness in its many forms, AND wise counsel and advice from experts -- be they professionals or every day people -- for living as followers of Jesus.

This past Tuesday, in back-to-back interviews, I chatted with Eric Blehm, author of the Adam Brown bio, Fearless...

Adam, Kelly, Nathan and Savannah Brown



...and Rod Dreher, author of The Little Way of Ruthie Leming...



Claire, Mike, Rebecca, Ruthie and Hannah Leming (photo taken the day after her cancer diagnosis)



...which chronicles his sister's battle with cancer. I was a weepy mess reading both books, but so grateful for the opportunity to be clearly reminded, yet again, that:

• Death is NOT the end of our lives
• The final death will be death itself (take THAT, Satan)
• Jesus' followers are called to give each other the space and grace to be the one-of-a-kind masterpieces God created us to be
• Sacrificial, servant love is POWERFUL
• As Beth Moore says, "there ain't no high like the Most High (Beth Moore, you rock!)

Tuesday, we cried. Wednesday, we celebrated wise counsel from Rhonda Stoppe on raising sons to be godly men. Thursday, Susie Larson built up our confidence in God and His good plans for us. And Friday? We welcome the time to laugh, yet again, on BLT.

Yes, there is a time for everything in life AND Mid-Morning.

I'm so grateful and glad to spend time with you every weekday morning!

Lynne

P.S. While Tuesday's interviews were stellar, I urge you to read the books, as well. How else would you know that Adam Brown wore the Batman underwear his kids gave him for Christmas whenever he went into battle, including the day he died? That he took a dare to sit for thirty seconds, bare- um, "-orbed," on a fire ants' hill, winning enough money to buy his wife a diamond necklace AND the admiration of the other Navy SEALS' wives? Or that Ruthie Leming's passion for the outdoors began when was just a toddler, barely big enough to grab her bottle, a couple of diapers, and climb into the cab of her daddy's truck when he headed out to repair fences on the family's farm? God had things to say to me through Adam's and Ruthie's stories; He has things to say to you, too.