Almost There!

Oh y'all...this week has been so crazy busy I haven't even had time to blog. (Shhhh don't tell Lynne!)

Hard to believe that in four days...I'm getting married! It feels a little more real today since Marion (our amazingly hilarious IT guy) changed my email so I'm officially Bekah Shaffer now. I posted on Facebook that I'm now email official...so as soon as I follow that up with being God-official and Facebook-official, I should be good to go! :)

So thankful for the wildly unexpected changes God brought to my life this year through Ryan's presence in my life. So thankful for answers to 30 years of prayer.

And I can't wait to stand at the edge of the water in a pretty dress and say a forever, lifetime YES to this man who so completely captured my heart and continues to care for it so sweetly.

I'm excited to honor lives that were cut short on this earth, yet still impacted me so greatly and have helped mold me into the woman I am today.

(Our honorary bridesmaid and groomsman, representing my former roommate, Angela Kent, who died of breast cancer last December, almost a year to the day of our wedding and my nephew, Kirk Blackburn, who was stillborn when I was ten.)

I'm excited to share the elements we have planned for our ceremony - and then tell you all about them when I get back!

I'm excited to see the ocean. (Okay technically the gulf. But whatever. It's bigger than a creek. That's good enough for me!)

And no matter what happens...I'm just so excited that at the end of the day, I'll be Mrs. Ryan Shaffer!

I will be blogging over at Bekah's Bits next week, giving you peeks into the wedding! Love you all!

I'm Thankful...Even Though I'm Only Blogging Once This Month!

I'm grateful that the blog-loving Bekah decided to exercise her thankfulness muscle (it's large and well-toned) by writing weekday "What I'm Thankful For" posts the entire month of November. I'm especially grateful that she didn't expect me to participate but, instead, extended a gentle, no-expectations' invitation to take a day.

This, the 20th day of November, is that day!

There is much in my life that warrants a thank-you: my husband, Doug, and his restored relationship with Christ; our son, J.R. and our new daughter-in-law, Jeni, and new grandson, Elijah; Bekah and all that she brings to my work and personal life; and God's extravagant answers to our Mid-Morning prayers, to name just a few.

I'm also grateful for carpenters, those skilled workers who can create, build, and repair using their hands, a few tools, and a tape measure.

Doug's best friend in college double-majored in math and physics at a private Indiana school known for its rigorous academics. Yet when he graduated, he became a carpenter. When we renovated our kitchen (on the skinniest of shoestring budgets), Greg oversaw the project. He installed cabinets, hung beadboard, and built a banquette. In the living room, he crafted a new mantle, attached beadboard behind the shelves, and widened the bottom shelves to accommodate storage.

Every day for three weeks, this quiet man with a brilliant, inquisitive mind, measured (twice), cut, and hammered a new room into existence, and renewed our nondescript fireplace area . He brought the ideas in my head to life, and created areas so beautiful and homey, that I am swallowed up by gratefulness whenever I enter the spaces.

I love making a nest of pillows on the banquette and reading. If there's sunshine streaming through the window, even better!

              
The beadboard creates just the right amount of texture to showcase single items, like this birdhouse made from barn wood.

It's amazing what crown molding, beadboard, a beefier mantle, and molding on a cabinet door can do for a space -- and for very little money.

To all of the men and women who labor with their hands to create and repair -- plumbers, electricians, mechanics, and carpenters, to name a few -- thank you for your special forms of restoration.

You are appreciated and valued.


            

Holidays = "Opportunities for Growth"

I think most of you know that I used to work in Financial Aid. It was a stretch for me because I hate math. And math hates me right back. Were it not for the grace of God and the invention of math software, I never would have survived.

Much of what we did was driven by government regulation, and as you might imagine, those rules changed quite regularly. When our supervisor would call a meeting to inform us of change (and the subsequent steps we'd have to take to undo/redo/unlearn/relearn something) she always called it "an opportunity."

I loved that about her because I appreciated her positive spin on life, even when there truly wasn't anything positive to be found, but you can well imagine how I grew to detest the word "opportunity."

STOP GIVING ME OPPORTUNITIES!!!! I'M OPPORTUNITIED OUT!!!!!!

I might be out of Financial Aid, but I've learned that opportunities exist everywhere. Saturday I had the opportunity to extend warm hospitality and grace to a service guy who came to install something at the house. Instead, I stormed into the yard (in a very unbecoming fashion, I assure you) to aggressively rake leaves into bags while Ryan stayed behind in the house offering a second cup of coffee in Jesus' name and genuinely investing in the service guy.

It was with many tears and much self-disappointment later that  I tried to spill to Ryan (in coherent thoughts) just why the guy had annoyed me so much and how I wished I could have so easily had my fiance's giving, compassionate heart. In turn, Ryan gently wiped away my tears and explained how much the guy had really done to help us.

Opportunity failure, party of one, right here.

You might not work in Financial Aid and you might not be out punishing your yard (in such a way that leaves you with aching muscles the next day) but perhaps you have a great opportunity coming up this week.

Thanksgiving.

I always loved what Mark Lowry said about family: "You know what I'm talking about. You'll cry at their funeral but you don't want to go on vacation with them."

It's true! Family. We need them and yet for so many, nothing creates an "opportunity for growth" like an afternoon together around a turkey table.

Chuck Lynch joined us on Mid-Morning today to talk about how to relate to your adult children during the holidays. I sat at the engineering board furiously scribbling notes, and this was one of my favorite quotes: "God never gives us grace for other people's responsibility. He only gives grace, power and courage for our own responsibility."

Do you have one of those opportunity people in your family? The one that drives you to hide in the bathroom and taste the salt of hot tears while everyone else is oblivious to the pain? The one that drives you to make rather drastic "alternate plans" so you don't even have to attend the festivities?  Live in the freedom that you're not responsible for her. You're only responsible for you.

And I loved this too - straight from Scripture: "If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all." Romans 12:18

And perhaps...dare I say it? Be thankful for the person that gives you the growth opportunity. I'm not sure that today I can say I'm THANKFUL for the one in my life that God is currently convicting me. but I can say I'm thankful for the way the conflict is driving me into the arms of my Beloved.

Tweets n Blogs

Call me crazy, but it's true...God uses tweets and blog posts to speak to me. Sometimes to comfort, sometimes to encourage, sometimes to convict. But He's using them. And today, it's what I'm thankful for!

Can I share a few tweets that came through on our feed today that just blessed me?

"We want clarity & God gives a call.We want a road map & God gives a relationship. We want answers & God gives His hand" - Ann Voskamp

"To discover grace is to discover God's utter devotion to you, his stubborn resolve to give you a cleansing, healing love." - Max Lucado

"Don't expect everyone to accept, understand, affirm, endorse, approve of, or support your obedience to God. Can you handle disapproval?" - Christine Caine

"Prayer is the difference between THE BEST U CAN DO and THE BEST GOD CAN DO." - Mark Batterson

"Although we're mostly stinkers, more deserving of discipline than mercy, our Redeemer chooses to lavish us w/affection. Makes my heart leap!" - Lisa Harper

"It's only 7:45, and already I need to start today over...resetting my attitude at the Throne of Grace." - Carol Floch (Appreciate the honesty!!)
Maybe you're not into Twitter for yourself...but I tell you...it's worth following some of these folks just to be inspired! And every now and then...a good laugh accompanies a few of them!

And then there are the blogs. The ones I know I can get great encouragement from. Check some of these out!

ANN VOSKAMP - Blogs at A Holy Experience. Always such good things to take away from her deep and practical approach to life!

ANGIE SMITH - Blogs at Bring the Rain. She's on a trip with Compassion right now and her blogs are so heart rending!

THE (IN)COURAGE GIRLS - from Dayspring. Angie and Ann are actually both part of that circuit, but there are many others too and they take turns blogging much inspiration.

MANDY - Blogs at Biblical Homemaking. She does it all and still manages to be relatable and lovable.

BETH MOORE - Need I say more? The Mama of the Living Proof Ministries blog has great, moving things to say - alongside her daughter Melissa and her assistant Lindsee.

CAROLINE ROTHSCHILD - Blogs at Jane Caroline. The daughter-in-law of Jennifer Rothschild is wise beyond her years and I love her style.

Thankful for all these people and how their words lift me up - from 140 characters and beyond!

Random and Frivolous

I told Lynne during BLT this morning that I really feel like I'm hogging the thankfulness factor on here this month. Been trying to coerce her into writing a blog post, but y'all, she's been SO BUSY. Some days are a 3 diet coke day for her and that's so serious. SO serious.

Today, perhaps in honor of We Like It Wednesday (and yes, I know it's Thursday, but we talked about them on BLT) - I'm picking some random, perhaps frivolous, things I'm thankful for. But I am, nonetheless, thankful.

Speaking of We Like it Wednesdays, I'm thankful for Pinterest. (HEY. I told you in the title it was random and frivolous. But I've gotten SO many good ideas for food...for gifts...for house decorations. Seriously. How did I function before Pinterest??

I'm thankful for peppermint mochas. This is hilarious to me since peppermint actually gives me a headache. (So if you're ever eating peppermint or chewing peppermint gum, please oh please do not come sit next to me. I beg you.) But the peppermint in the mocha is subtle and chocolatey enough that I can handle it and it makes me SO SO happy.

This one seems super silly to me, but maybe you can relate. Ryan talked to someone the other day that we went to high school with. I was such a wallflower in high school and most people didn't know I existed. Maybe that was you too - and you know it can be kind of a hard thing to get over. You feel...a little ugly and forgotten. Anyway. Ryan told me that this girl (who was, in my estimation, in a very high and beautiful league) told him she reads my blog and she likes it. I'll take acceptance 15 years later. Oh yes I will! Dumb, but slightly healing to me. And for that, I'm thankful.

I'm thankful for blogs. I can still remember when my co-worker Jim talked me into blogging. I resisted. I said no. I was so afraid! But he finally set UP the blog for me and gave me the password...and said, "Here. Blog." And now I can't imagine NOT blogging. I am thankful for the outlet it is for me...thankful for the friends I've met through that adventure!

Thankful for brand new Bibles. I blogged about this over at my own blog today. I love a new Bible for a new season in life, and I'd say marriage qualifies as a new season!  So thankful for the fresh, crisp pages and the journey I'll walk while living in those pages!!

That's my randomness for today. What are you thankful for today? No item too frivolous!!

Rest...

Denise George visited Mid-Morning today and gave us permission to rest.

Praise. The. Lord.

Do you ever feel guilty for resting? Feel guilty for saying no when people ask you to do things? Feel guilty for sitting when there are 210,000 things that demand your attention?

Denise said to knock that off. (Actually she was MUCH more eloquent than that, but that's the Bekah paraphrase. Even Jesus needed rest, she said. God ordained it.

And can I just tell you...I am so thankful for rest.

When I was growing up, my parents were very fastidious about keeping the Sabbath as a day of rest. They never made a deal out of it. In fact, the first time I really knew it was a purposeful things was when I was in the third grade and forgot to do some homework on Saturday. When I asked Mom for help on Sunday, she did help...and then gently told me that I wouldn't be allowed to do homework on Sunday in the future, because it was a day of rest.

Like any kid, I found the whole process of life coming to a screeching halt on Saturday to be quite an inconvenient. But as an adult, I'm so grateful for that precedent. I love Sundays so much now, because it's one day a week when I'm guaranteed to sit and...dare I say it??....rest.

I can take naps without guilt...take walks...scrapbook...read...write...cook...journal...whatever seems most restful to me!

But Sundays are just one day.

What if I dared to be more restful throughout the week? To say no to something in favor of extra time with the Lord or extra sleep?

It's a thought to ponder.

Meanwhile, I'm thankful for parents who set a rest precedent!

New Families

Today on Mid-Morning, we shared a day of thankfulness. Lynne and I offered ides for everything from kids' activities for Thanksgiving day to what to do with your leftover mashed potatoes. Oh, and I learned that ginger comes in forms OTHER than ground up in a jar on the spice shelf. WHO KNEW?

Then we opened the phone lines and you all called in with BEAUTIFUL tributes of thanks for what God has been doing in your lives. Several of you were thankful for your families, and that led Lynne to mention the joy of good mothers-in-law.

Lynne LOVED her mother-in-law and always is quick to pay her a kind word any chance she gets. I love that about Lynne and I always appreciated the hope it gave me that I could maybe someday have a good relationship with my own mother-in-law!

Actually I've been praying for that since high school.

Praying for God to open up the door for me to have a great relationship with the woman who raised the man I would come to love.

And He so did.

Ryan's mom and I were actually friends before he and I ever started dating. She was such an encouragement to me and she has (ahem) a photo obsession similar to mine. :) She prayed for me and loved me and was just an all-around good friend.

I'll never forget the night Ryan "took me home to meet his mom." Of course we'd already met but she didn't know he was pursuing me. And I'd never been taken home to meet anyone's mom before. Ryan drove me to her house and I hid in the garage, heart pounding, while he went inside to tell her that he had a surprise for her. He came back out, took my hand, and led me into the house where the looks of surprise, thankfulness, and utter relief collided on her face. And I had tears in my eyes because I knew God honored my request.

She's lovely in every way, and I not only adore and appreciate the way she has welcomed me into the family, but I appreciate the relationship she has with Ryan. I appreciate how she raised him to love and honor the Lord.

If I'd dreamed up a family to enter, this would have been just the kind of family I would have picked. Not only is she great...but all the rest have welcomed me with open arms too. Aunts, uncles, grandparents, siblings, cousins - all of them.

I'm grateful.